Everyone says femininity is a mindset. And in order to tap into your feminine energy, wear softer fabrics, buy the dress.
But which of those tips are actually confirmed by science?
I was curious to find out what actually moves the needle.
So I dug into the research and found nine specific cues that have been linked to perceived femininity or attractiveness.
And here’s what surprised me: some have nothing to do with your wardrobe. They involve how you walk, how you speak, and even the way you style your hair. A few don’t cost a thing.
Here are nine science-backed ways to look more feminine and attractive.
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1. Sway Your Hips.
Everyone obsesses over makeup and dresses. But, almost nobody thinks about how they walk! That’s a big mistake.
In one study, animated figures perceived as women were rated about 50% more attractive just for walking with a feminine hip sway.
Same body, same outfit, different walk.
And why this finding is important for you, is that it is free tool, that takes zero money, yet can increase your attractiveness significantly and instantly.
And most women never practice it!
Here’s my take: keep it subtle. If you overdo it and it looks like a performance. So what I’d encourage you to do, is to try it at home in front of a mirror, in heels and in flats, until it feels like you.
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2. Increase the Contrast Between Your Eyes or Lips and The Skin.
Most women already wear makeup on their eyes or lips. It enhances our features.
But here’s the science behind it: female faces naturally have more contrast between the eyes, lips and the skin around them than male faces do.
And what makeup does is that it raises that contrast further.
And this in consequence, increases our perceived femininity and attractiveness. When you darken your lashes, define your eyes, or add lip color, you’re amplifying a signal the brain already reads as female.
My take: Pick one feature, eyes or lips, and make it stand out against your skin. Otherwise, it could be a bit too much.
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3. Keep Your Hair on the Longer Side.
Hair trends come and go: bleached, boyish, blunt bob.
But which length do men actually rate as most attractive? In a study that compared six hairstyles, only long and medium-length hair raised women’s attractiveness ratings.
But here’s the good news for you: you don’t need waist-length, Slavic hair. Medium length is absolutely enough!
If you want to look more feminine, grow it a little past your shoulders and skip the trend chasing.
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4. Smooth, Clear and Healthy Skin.
With the amount of marketing and information on skincare out there, it comes not as a surprise that smooth, clear skin is considered as feminine. In one study, faces with more even skin were rated as more attractive.
But here’s the thing: most women reach for foundation first to even out their skin tone. And there is nothing wrong with that.
However, makeup only covers skin, it doesn’t change it.
But why not to actually invest in the skin itself?
I’m 33, and my skin is the best it’s ever been, thanks to my skincare routine.
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Recently, I’ve also tried the XERF treatment, which, I won’t lie, was quite costly: around $2,000 for one treatment! I’ll share my before-and-after results in my skincare post soon, so stay tuned!
5. Higher pitch voice.
When we think “feminine,” we often think hair, skin and makeup.
But did you know that your voice shapes how you come across just as much!
In several studies (1, 2), men preferred women’s voices with a raised pitch, whatever the starting pitch.
Voice has a lot to do with biology, but how you use it is partly up to you.
Here’s a funny personal story: my husband prefers my voice in English, where I naturally speak a bit higher than in my native language.
My take: try speaking a touch higher, but only as high as still feels natural. If it feels forced, it won’t read as feminine.
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6. Healthy BMI is a Win-Win for You.
Here’s the uncomfortable part: body shape and weight can influence how attractive people perceive us to be.
This may come across as shallow, but there may be a biological component to these preferences.
But the research (1, 2) is messier than the headlines. In one study, BMI mattered about twice as much as waist-to-hip ratio, and across studies the results vary by culture and context.
However, maintaining a healthy weight can benefit your overall health and longevity, and it may also influence how others perceive your attractiveness.
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7. Show Your Waist.
Women come in all shapes: hourglass, apple, pear.
But one cue shows up again and again in the research: a defined waist relative to the hips.
In a classic study, normal-weight figures with a low waist-to-hip ratio were ranked as attractive.
Here’s my take: too many of us hide in shapeless or baggy clothes!
You don’t need to change your body, you often need simply clothes that fit it.
Learn what works for your shape, then bring the waist forward with a belt, a wrap, or a tailored cut.
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8. Wear Red!
Red has a reputation as the color of romance.
But is it just a stereotype? In one set of studies, men rated women wearing red as more attractive and sexually desirable than women in other colors.
It didn’t change how kind or intelligent they seemed, so the effect is about attraction, not personality.
And why it is important to you, is because it is the easiest tip on this list.
No practice, no treatment, just a red dress, top or lip.
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9. Wear Heels.
Heels have a bad reputation for being uncomfortable, and with 12 cm stilettos, that’s fair!
But in one study, women in heels were rated as more attractive, more feminine and higher in status.
So here’s what I think: you don’t need to suffer in a pair of super-high heels. A low heel of about 4 to 5 cm (roughly 1.5 to 2 inches) is much easier to wear, and comfort-focused brands exist!
I recently found Cozy Iceland, which makes heels designed for comfort (not sponsored).
My take: pick a heel you can walk naturally in, because if you wobble, it won’t read as elegant.
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