From the moment I became aware of myself on this planet, I started to recognize ‘my place’ in the world. For example, when it comes to my appearance, I decided that while I am attractive, I’m not a perfect 10 out of 10. As a result, I felt like I ‘deserved’ a certain level of treatment based on how I looked.
Similarly, when I thought about my family’s financial situation, I understood our position. As a teen, we were very much a middle-class family—not poor, but definitely struggling at times. So once again, I felt like I didn’t ‘deserve’ to dream about Chanel bags, a luxury car, or a wealthy husband.
But then I came across The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, and it completely blew my mind. I started to understand so many things, and thank God I did!
I started to understand that we, as humans, deserve to have the life we desire and are worthy of the things and experiences we want. This was a huge breakthrough for me – to overcome those limiting beliefs and realize that, in fact, I can dream of something that is ‘above my level’ as given at birth.
It doesn’t mean I’m now the most confident version of myself, but I’ve made a lot of progress. I feel a strong calling to share my journey with others, and I hope I can inspire at least one person to be brave – to dream big and take action to create the life they truly want.
So, I wanted to share the lessons I’ve learned so far, and thank you for taking the time to read them.
We Don’t Live in One World
As an introduction, I wanted to mention this: we often think there is only one world we all live in. But in reality, that’s not true. YOU create your own world through your mind and thoughts. For example, you might believe that becoming a millionaire is impossible for you. But I can assure you, there are many people who have come from similar or even worse circumstances than yours, and yet, they’ve achieved financial freedom.
What does that mean?
It means that this other person sees the world differently. He or she is living in a reality where becoming a millionaire is entirely possible. On the other hand, maybe this same person believes they will never be able to dance. Meanwhile, you might be an incredible dancer, even if you have less favorable conditions – like body type or flexibility – than this millionaire.
This just shows how everyone creates their own version of the world based on their beliefs.
It means that, even though both of you live on the same planet, you don’t perceive the world in the same way.
Your beliefs, mindset, and experiences shape how you see and navigate life, creating entirely different realities for each of you.
It also means that the world you live in is shaped by you – through your beliefs, thoughts, and certainties about what is possible and what is not.
It also means that it is possible to change those beliefs and, in doing so, transform your world and your reality.
1. Be Aware Of Your Thoughts
The first step to changing your world is to become aware of your thoughts and beliefs. For instance, imagine you are preparing for a test. If you believe that you are a bad student, you are likely to put less effort into studying. When the day of the test arrives, your lack of preparation leads to a poor grade, which in turn reinforces your belief that you are indeed a bad student.
Another example: imagine you believe you will never meet a nice guy. Then, you encounter a gentleman who is genuinely interested in you. However, because you doubt his sincerity, you may behave in a way that repels him or causes him to act rudely toward you. This, in turn, reinforces your original belief that nice guys don’t exist.
For example:
This is why breaking your beliefs can be so challenging! However, the first step toward change, as I mentioned, is awareness.
2. Positive Affirmations
Here, affirmations can be incredibly helpful. Positive thinking may sound a bit silly at first, but the key is to consistently remind yourself every day, out loud, that you can achieve your goals. For example:
“I am a great boss. My business is flourishing, and I help people through my work.”
And repeat it several times a day. At first, I thought it was silly, but when I tried it, I discovered that you actually begin to believe in it! You start to embrace those affirmations, and you feel joy – and that’s everything you need for success: belief and feeling good.
That’s why I occasionally share positive words on my Pinterest – I hope people find them inspiring. I also discovered a free app called The Greatest Secret, which offers daily gratitude practices, affirmations, and inspiring stories.
3. Practice Gratitude
And yes, feeling grateful is essential for achieving success.
Feeling grateful is a crucial component of achieving success, as it helps shift your mindset from scarcity to abundance. When you practice gratitude, you focus on the positives in your life, allowing you to recognize and appreciate the opportunities and resources available to you. This positive mindset not only enhances your overall well-being but also attracts more good things into your life. By regularly acknowledging what you are thankful for, you cultivate a sense of contentment and joy, which fuels your motivation and resilience. Ultimately, gratitude creates a powerful foundation for personal growth and success, enabling you to pursue your goals with a renewed sense of purpose and optimism.
4. Fight Against The Nagging Voice In Your Mind
Literally everyone has this annoying, nagging voice in their minds. You want to draw something, and your mind tells you, “It’s so ugly; you can’t do it.” You want to dance, and your mind says, “Look at your ugly body; you’re fat.”
No, we need to understand that it’s just our stupid monkey mind telling us things that are NOT TRUE and are limiting! We have to break through this! But how can we overcome this voice when, after all, it’s in our heads? You can’t just set your mind aside and live your life.
Well, first of all, we need to be aware of this voice, which is extremely hard. You need to spot this voice every day, every hour, as it starts its monologue. I notice it in myself a few times each day. In the beginning, it would sadden me or make me put less effort into whatever I was doing, as I presumed that I couldn’t succeed anyway or that it didn’t make sense.
With daily practice, I manage to spot this voice most of the time. I immediately tell myself, “No! Cancel, cancel this thought. It is not true.” Instead, I focus on positive affirmations that I truly believe: “You can do it. You are perfect exactly as you are at this moment. You are strong, and you can do it!”
And it helps me enormously.
5. Force Yourself To Think Positive Thoughts Through Affirmations
So you’ve managed to notice your annoying mind. Now, on top of canceling the limiting thoughts that you notice and telling yourself motivational thoughts, you also need to think positively. I know it’s hard, especially for people who are naturally more prone to depression—I have very close family members who struggle with depression, so I understand how much work it is for you to navigate this world. I send love to everyone who is going through this, and just know that you are perfect as you are, and you’re doing a great job by simply living on this planet every day. ❤️
So you really need to force yourself to think positively. I think what works best for me is the affirmations I mentioned earlier. I tell myself a few times a day: “What a beautiful day! What a magical planet! Look at those impressive clouds, the magnificent plants, and the nature around.” I also say: “I am successful, I am beautiful, I am a happy wife and mother. I am loved every day and every minute, and I fully deserve it. I trust the universe to send me everything I need to feel loved and to be successful.”
And I say it to myself a few times, and the funny thing is that you actually start to believe it. When I tell myself, “I am successful in anything I do,” I really believe it. Or when I say, “I am happy, happy, happy,” I can actually feel the warmth of joy fill my body! It really feels amazing, costs nothing, and helps lift your mood!
And what happens if you are happy? Happy things happen to you. Some people refer to this as energy, vibrations, and say that you are vibrating on higher frequencies. After all, we are energetic beings. However, if you don’t want to believe in such statements, there is still another very logical reason to prove why this is true.
Imagine two situations that start in the same way, but you are in different states of mind—one negative and one positive. You go to the grocery store to buy some milk. You enter the shop, where there are many people because it is Saturday morning, the weather is beautiful and sunny, and everyone decided to stock up on necessities at exactly the same time you went to the store. You are already slightly irritated by all those people around. You finally manage to get to the shelf with the milk, but you cannot find your favorite brand. Annoyed, you call for the assistant. He is having a bad day too; he had a fight with his girlfriend that morning. You ask for your brand but are not very pleasant about it. He is also annoyed, so he says something rude to you, and you end up in a small argument. Frustrated, you leave the store, letting your ego take over, and push past a few people on your way out. You receive some angry looks from other shoppers and even hear a few comments. You rush to another store by car, but unfortunately, you get stuck in a traffic jam for 30 minutes. Can life sometimes have pity on you?
The same situation, but with a positive mindset: You go to the store to buy your favorite brand of milk. You notice that the sun is beautiful, and you feel grateful for having access to milk so easily because you live in a civilized country and you also have the money to afford it. After all, a few hundred years ago, it wouldn’t have been so easy to get your unsweetened organic almond milk in a glass bottle. You enter the crowded store, but you don’t mind the crowds. You smile, thinking that everyone has to do their shopping, and you picture in your head the tasty pumpkin spice latte that you will make using this milk.
You manage to find the shelf with the milk, but unfortunately, you cannot find the brand. You call the shopping assistant, who is visibly angry. Instead of mirroring his state of mind (which we often do, by the way), you manage to stay aware of keeping your energy and thoughts positive. So, you ask politely with a big smile on your face. The angry assistant is a bit surprised by your positive energy. He replies politely, still affected by the fight he had that morning with his girlfriend. You hold a quick conversation, and his mood gets a bit better thanks to you—after all, you have the power to influence people with your energy, so don’t underestimate that! Your smile can make someone’s day!
For example, once I was feeling really sad because I didn’t have a boyfriend. I was using a dating app and being very careful to find someone serious. I went out with one guy for two dates, but he had just told me that he didn’t see it going anywhere and wanted to be friends. I thought I would never find someone. I went to a store to buy some food, and the shopping assistant—a nice, slightly older guy—gave me a candy for free and a big, friendly smile. It was such a nice surprise that it gave me hope and brought my mood back to positive!
The assistant goes to the back of the store to find your milk, motivated to help you. He comes back in three minutes with your milk in hand. You are so happy! You smile brightly and thank him sincerely. You also give him a compliment for being so polite and helpful, expressing your gratitude for his work. His mood brightens (isn’t it the best feeling ever to help someone be more positive?). You are happy too. You go to pay for the milk and head back to your car. You drive home, avoiding the traffic jam, and prepare your favorite drink—pumpkin spice latte with organic almond milk from a glass bottle.
Do you see how the circumstances of your life can change when you are positive? People often mirror your mood. Even if they are angry or sad, seeing a positive person usually makes them feel better or at least aware that they should behave differently. This shift in attitude can lead to different outcomes. It’s not just trivial things like grocery shopping; it applies to various aspects of life.
At work, for example, if you are a happy colleague, you won’t be treated the same way as if you look visibly bored with what you are doing. Similarly, if you are a happy wife, your husband will treat you differently, and you will appear more attractive to him. The same applies if you have your own business—everything improves when you think positive thoughts! So, do everything you can to think as many positive thoughts as possible, and trust me, your life will be different!
6. Work with Your Subconscious Mind to Understand What Limits You
One practice that I learned from Rhonda is to ask your subconscious mind why you are in a particular situation. For example, imagine you really want to open a business, but you try and try, and it never works out. Ask yourself, “Why is this happening?” Your subconscious mind will answer immediately—just listen. You might hear, “I don’t believe I am capable of this; I don’t believe it will work out.” This is your “aha” moment. This is your limiting belief! Remember, there are thousands of people in similar situations to yours, with comparable backgrounds, who have successfully opened their businesses.
I have found this practice to be very helpful. For example, when I feel shy and lack confidence, I ask myself why I feel this way. My mind often responds, “Because I think you are not pretty enough, not calm enough, and not eloquent enough.” At that moment, I immediately stop and challenge these thoughts, telling myself, “No, this is not true! I am enough; I deserve to be respected. I deserve to express myself in my own way, with my own light. I do not need to compare myself to others or to other women; I can be myself and shine with my own light, helping others in the process.”
7. Realize That Even the Most Successful People on This Planet Have the Same Doubts as You
I don’t know why, but I tend to glorify others a lot while not giving myself the same credit. Maybe you feel the same way; maybe you don’t. I can’t speak for everyone, but if you also think that other people have it all sorted out, know that everyone – even Elon Musk and Oprah Winfrey – has doubts about themselves and limiting beliefs.
What sets them apart is that they simply don’t believe those doubts. People who struggle to achieve what they want in life often do believe their doubts. So, remember that even the beautiful models you admire, like Miranda Kerr (my idol!) or Romee Strijd, also experience those nagging thoughts and doubts!
This knowledge helps me during tough times when I struggle to believe in myself. It reminds me that we are all the same. Even those people who appear super confident also have their off days.
8. Visualize the End Result and Feel Your Emotions
Now that you are aware of your nagging mind, practicing affirmations and gratitude, and recognizing that everyone on this planet has to “fight” with their thoughts, another technique that helps me immensely is to visualize my life as if my goals are already in my possession. Picture yourself in that scenario, fully immersed in the moment with your goals achieved.
How would you feel? Would you feel happy? Proud? Satisfied? Calm? Alive? Allow yourself to experience those emotions as if they are happening right now. This practice not only reinforces your belief in the possibility of your goals but also aligns your mindset with the feelings of success and fulfillment.
How would the expressions on your face look? Would you smile brightly? Would your forehead be smooth and relaxed? Would you carry a confident yet relaxed posture?
And now, feel as though you truly already have your goal. For example, if you want to have a boyfriend, act as if you already do. Dress nicely for him. Make sure you have space on the table for two. Prepare space in your closet for him. Be flirty and happy; feel loved and desired.
This will change you. It will alter how you behave and how you carry yourself around others. This, in turn, will influence them; they will see you differently. New opportunities will come your way, including your dream boyfriend. 🙂
9. List of Moments in Life When You Achieved What You Wanted
Another helpful tip is to list the moments in your life when you achieved something you wanted or overcame a difficult situation. Perhaps it was losing weight, picking yourself up after a breakup, organizing a big dinner for friends, or helping someone in need. Include anything you are proud of that you once thought was impossible.
This should strengthen your image of yourself. Because in those moments, you managed to stay strong, not give up, find solutions, and apply them successfully. You know how to do this, and there is no reason why you would lose this capability.
Conclusion
Finding the path to confidence, self-worth, and the feeling that you deserve everything in life can be long and difficult. But it is also possible. Through awareness and inner work, you can truly move mountains. Once you manage to change your perception of life, your world will change. This is where you need to start. I sincerely hope that you found this post helpful; I wrote it with my whole heart. My wish is that it can assist at least one person. Thank you for reading!